We allow that liquid gold to flow down the storm drains or to overwhelm our sewer systems without even attempting to overcharge thirsty people for it. Somehow or another, we’ve ignored making serious money off our most plentiful natural resource. Who needs crypto when you have swimming pools of water falling from the sky? A good Cat 3 could put the kids through college. Hurricanes and tropical storms could become serious money-making opportunities. Just collect the falling rain and direct it toward those jugs and sell them for $10 apiece. All we each need is a big tarp and a bunch of gallon milk jugs. Think about it, there are pipelines that deliver oil and gas thousands of miles, why not a water pipeline? You think Sly Stallone and the Kardashians wouldn’t plunk down serious bucks for some Sweet Home Alabama water right now? All we need is a really huge funnel at our end of the pipeline, and - Boom! - drinking water galore in the other L.A.Ī bottle of water at the convenience store is almost $3 now, so just imagine how much we could gouge Californians for when their Bel Air lawns are drying up?Īs individuals, we could get in on this as well. It feels like we ought to be able to make some serious money out of all this agua. I mean, I’d rather have that issue than wildfires and flow restrictors, but sewer overflows aren’t going to help tourism or the monkeypox outbreak. That’s one of the problems of having so much water - raw sewage floating down the street. Also, we’re already up to about 1,000 sewer system overflows in the past three weeks, so no reason to encourage more of that. But I don’t, because I know it’s morally wrong and moronically stupid. Sometimes when it’s raining really hard, I’m tempted to flush the toilet a few times just to fight back.
#BABY ELEPHANT PLAIN CLIP ART HOW TO#
While most of the world is worried about conserving water and trying to figure out how to only flush the toilet once a week, we can waste water to our hearts’ content. In most parts of the country and even the world, having enough water is a huge problem. The local government is threatening to place “flow restrictors” on their homes if these Hollywood bigshots don’t stop using so much water keeping their compounds looking lush.įlow restrictors? In our area, we’re more concerned about restrictor plates in NASCAR, but that’s a totally separate issue.
Just yesterday I read a story about celebrities like Sylvester Stallone, Kevin Hart and a Kardashian or two who are in trouble for using too much water in California. Now, we sort of have it made compared to many parts of the country that due to a combination of population overgrowth and drought, find themselves subject to insane-sounding punishments just for watering the lawn.
Hundreds of years ago, the environment in our area must have seemed especially challenging, with the rain, hurricanes, malaria and whatnot.
She doesn’t talk to the media about her health or skincare.) We’re not hearing as much of that “dry heat” “low humidity” “perfect weather” talk about California these days. I’m sure anyone from the southwestern part of the country who might happen to read my complaints about the rain would curse me for callously flaunting our wealth of H2O - that’s if their dust-covered, dehydrated vocal cords still actually work. I’m not sure where we stand on replicated humans, but if the dystopian future includes never-ending rain, we may have arrived.
#BABY ELEPHANT PLAIN CLIP ART MOVIE#
This is like the original “Blade Runner” movie where Harrison Ford tries to kill human replicants in a nonstop downpour. If you’ve lived around here for any amount of time, you’re used to the afternoon showers in late summer, but this is not that. This also makes a perfect hiding spot for shorter criminals who aren’t allergic to dandelions or afraid of being eaten by the giant carnivorous-looking weed that’s grown up near the back of the garage. The grass is growing at an epic rate, but can’t hold a candle to the weeds, which you can actually watch get taller just by staring for 30 seconds. This ridiculous, nonstop rain we’ve had over the past month has my backyard looking like something out of “Jurassic Park.” The elephant ears alone are so big up to five medium-sized thieves could hide in them, and maybe even camp out under a leaf or two. But like Milli Vanilli, I also blame it on the rain.
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